Dreaming of Siberia

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Ever since I read Dostoevsky’s Crime and Punishment, I have been dreaming of a place that for most people is mainly associated with extreme weather, heavy snows and prison camps. Siberia. A place in Russia situated between the Ural Mountains and the Pacific Ocean. A land of endless snow and ultimate coldness. A scary place. At the end of the novel, the protagonist, Raskolnikov, confesses his crime and is sent to a Siberian prison for punishment. Sonia, his girlfriend, follows him because she had promised to follow him up to the end of the world.

Siberia has got a special significance for me. I often dream of it at night and secretly long for it during the day. It means so much more than all the things that make people dread it. It is the land of endless snows and heavy frosts, but also a land of redemption, the symbol of a fresh start, of a new life and a new beginning. Although associated with prisons and exile, it is, in a way, a symbol of freedom. Spiritual freedom. The freedom Christ has promised us. “The truth will set you free”.

It is the centre of the labyrinth, where we suddenly realize the monster we’ve been chasing is within ourselves, but also a chance to defeat that monster, to prove we are stronger than it.

It is about reaching a higher spiritual level, free from the chains of guilt and remorse, from a tormented conscience and a torn heart. The point when we become a new being, as pure as Siberian snow. The wind might roar, the frost might bite, but nothing compares to the liberating feeling in our hearts, the revelation of divine love within us.

In the middle of his punishment, Raskolnikov found the three most precious things in life: peace of mind, true love and a reason to go on. The endless white has turned into a symbol of the infinite, reminding us that, although we are limited as human beings, we can overcome our limits and follow that deep longing inside telling us to go further and deeper.

Siberia is the symbol of suffering, but not a destructive suffering. One that builds us and takes us to new spiritual levels. It reminds us that God has astounding way of reaching to us, and suffering is one of them.

When I was studying the methods of teaching in college, I came across the idea that the key to improving and learning is setting your goals a little higher than you can reach. Pushing further, trying to exceed your limits is the best way to find out who you are and what you’re capable of.

To someone used to the modern western philosophy, this might sound weird. We have been taught to seek the easy way out. But the shortest route is not always the best. We talk about exotic islands, palm trees and people lying on the beach. Yet, each one of us carries a Siberia inside.

Short Prayer for This Morning

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Lord God of all, thank you for this brand new morning, when everything seems so pure and fresh and another chapter in the book of my life is ready to unfold.

Open my eyes to see your greatness, open my ears to hear your voice, open my heart to surrender to your will and my mind to learn and understand your truths.

Make me a part of your great plan. Take me to places and situations where I can grow in faith and love and to people in whose lives I can make a difference. Use me to bring comfort and inspiration to those in need.

Amen

Prayer for Those Who Cry

My Lord, thank you for the gift of tears, for with tears comes surrender, and only in surrender can your work be made complete in our hearts. Please bless all those who cry and be with them every single moment of their journey, every step of the way. Hold their hand and when the pain becomes unbearable, carry them in your arms and let them find peace in your comforting embrace.

Take them to a point where they can grasp the hidden meaning of their tears; make them mature enough to see the whole picture and understand that everything works for their good and even bad things and situations are a blessing in disguise. Turn every tear that falls from their eyes into a drop of living water, cleansing them and setting them free. Teach them that surrendering to your will is the only real treasure they can have and help them grow in this understanding, so that they can let go of all the false treasures they are clinging to.

Let each and every one of their tears be a gate into new dimensions of faith, hope and love. Turn them into real people, with their hearts widely open and ready to receive your blessings. Make their faith stronger, so that it can turn their tears of pain into tears of gratitude and overwhelming joy. Let their heart be set free from all their worries and torments.

Blessed are those who can cry, for no flower ever grows in a dry desert and the soil needs rain to turn the seed into a tree. Let our tears water the soil of our hearts and make it fertile for the good seeds we bear within. And when the flowers bloom, and when the trees bring good fruit, let us remember you and the wonderful ways in which you work in us.

AMEN

The Candle

She woke up one night, her eyes were in tears,
She felt cold inside, tormented by fears.
The thick woolen blanket would not keep her warm.
The wind seemed to carry the seeds of a storm.

She was on her own, with no one around,
She trembled and jumped at each little sound.
Old nightmares rose from the mist of the past
To fill her with terror: “This night is your last”.

She tried to be brave, but a voice in her head
Was screaming in anguish: “Give up! You are dead!”
A sense of negation was sinking in all
The forces of darkness were huge; she was small.

“My Lord, I am frightened, will this be my end?
I’ve no one to save me, no lover, no friend.
My dreams come to haunt me. It’s all déjà vu.
I’m so lost and lonely. My Lord, where are You?”

She looked at the candle, its flame seemed to say:
“My child, don’t be frightened, I won’t go away.
No demon can touch you, to Me you belong.
No evil can harm you, with Me you are strong.

You see? It’s so simple. Just look at the flame.
The shadows are shifting but I am the same.
Wherever my light is, the darkness is gone.
For never can darkness and light be as one.

When one is within you, the other’s no more
One walks in, the other walks out of the door.
When dawn fills you deeply, the night falls apart,
For never can both be contained in a heart.

Just keep the door open and let my light in
No demon can face Me, out there or within.
Your candle is burning, there’s nothing to fear,
Just call Me, beloved, and I will be here.

The darkness seems endless, but it is not so.
Its trick is to make you believe it won’t go.
But once you have called Me, its power is lost,
When summer is blooming, there’s no room for frost.

When faith says its prayer, no demon can stay,
For night cannot cover the light of the day."

Prayer for Inner Change

Father of all, true living God, ever-loving, ever-forgiving, open the door of our hearts, so that they can be filled with your love up to the brim. Your love is light and wherever light is, darkness cannot be. Let your love flood every corner of our being and cast the shadows away. Clean us from inside and let the outside be a reflection of our inner transformation. Let our light shine like a candle in the night, silently testifying to the new beings we have become.

Let us be born again, not to death, bondage and decay, but to freedom, truth and everlasting life. Let our hearts be pure like those of little children, overflowing with trust and surrender. Dear Lord, teach us to be guided by your will every moment of every day and night, let your Holy Spirit work in us and through us to achieve miracles for your glory and the benefit of our neighbours.

Change us in wonderful ways, in ways full of power, beyond our imagination, beyond our wildest dreams. For you are so much greater than our hearts, so much wiser than our minds. Take us to new realms of peace and joy, to new dimensions of love and faith, to a place where our trust in you is so strong that we can move mountains.

Take us further than we ever thought we could reach and teach us never to be afraid, for you are always with us, in life as well as in death, here and beyond, forever and ever.

AMEN